Monday, May 30, 2011

Sad Everyone

Dino didn't make it through the holiday. After a dance recital, I took the kids to a friend's house and then Melissa and I took our boy up to the vet. It didn't take long, and now he's gone. The house is emptier than it's ever been and a large part of us is gone, as well. After the results of last week's blood work came in, the vet said he wouldn't make a month. He made five days, and we loved him hard every moment.

I hope Ricky's right. I'm going to keep trying.

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Sad Children

Our Golden Retriever is old, and has kidney disease, and the vet doesn't think he'll be around at the end of the year. The kids were in the room when she told me this. They handled themselves very well until we got into the car. We had the discussion about getting old and bodies breaking down and living life the best we can while we can.

And then my boy, through a faceful of tears, says, "Dad? Can you please believe in Heaven so we can see Dino again?"

I'll try, Ricky. I'll try.

Friday, May 20, 2011


Buried up to my eyeballs in proofing and other book work, schooling kids, and kids' sports. No, I'm not getting a chance to do much of anything else, including this.

Watched a doc on Netflix about maverick director James Toback called The Outsider. It's ostensibly a behind-the-scenes flick about the shooting of his film When Will I Be Loved with Neve Campbell (which is also on Netflix but haven't seen yet).

In any case, the documentary is well worth watching for all the reasons such films often are, but the point that struck me was made by Toback in an offhanded comment about addiction. He's been a heavy drug user in the past, had vicious gambling troubles, but had a bet with Campbell about quitting soda if she quit smoking. Hardly seems equitable but it ran into the fact that Toback used to smoke five, yes, five, packs of cigarettes a day.

When asked if it was difficult to stop, he said no, not at all. The thing is that he has an obsessive/addictive personality (clearly) and that a five pack a day monkey is an extreme. Going to zero is also an extreme. Moving from one extreme to the other fits in exactly with his personality.

What struck me was when he said that five to zero was easy, extreme to extreme, but had he tried to cut back to three packs a day he would have been screwed. In other words, moderating the behavior would be harder than inverting the extreme.

It's stuck with me. Very interesting concept.

And again, the film is excellent, not likely to be shown on cable, and can be viewed on demand, on your television, without the slightest hint of a commercial. Wish we'd dropped cable long ago. Haven't watched anything with a commercial in it for months. Haven't had any news of the Kardashians other than walking by their pictures on the supermarket tabloid covers.

I can live with that.