Trouser snakes

Elsewhere on this site I recounted the time I hiked Mt. Lafayette in the winter inadvertently wearing ladies' underwear. I have, as much as I can recall, kept mostly to myself the time I pantsed myself at a track meet in high school by, again inadvertently, hooking my thumbs inside my shorts and not just my sweat pants. Voila! The walls came down.

Yesterday I went to the post office and as I was crossing the street I tried to put my keys into the pocket of my shorts. For a moment I thought, these shorts don't have a pocket, but I knew they did, so I kept at it and sure enough, there it was. Angled toward the front.

As I was half twisted in the crosswalk of Main Street, I saw a woman behind me, smiling as though I knew her. I didn't, and now I know the look of a woman who recognizes someone who is wearing their shorts backward to the post office. I think the Adidas insignia behind the knee gave it away.

I didn't think there was anything I could do either on Main Street or inside the court house/post office that would actually make the situation better, so I went in, mailed my package, had a discussion about leftover cake with one of the employees, and slowly backed out of the building. I hope this doesn't become a habit.